Savour the flavour of murder
Also trying to save Ruddy Ruddy's soul, in their own way, are the People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals. I wonder if they got Ruddy Ruddy's name from the people who named him an official Ontario chicken lover, and if so, how did they interpret "lover"? As "one who loves chickens" or as "one who loves eating chickens"?
The latter seems likely, as they've thoughtfully sent along a vegetarian starter kit. If they thought they were preaching to the choir, they'd surely assume Ruddy Ruddy to already be keeping a vegetarian diet. They've also sent a CD-ROM containing a video of the song "Free Me", which is performed by John Feldmann of Goldfinger. As you might expect, the video contains "powerful footage of animals" -- cattle being branded and chicken being debeaked, for instance.
I didn't know Goldfinger were a vegetarian band, although it turns out their song "FTN" stands for "Fuck Ted Nugent", which is in itself an eminently reasonable viewpoint for many reasons. The lyrics are both pro-animal and anti-Jennifer Lopez, which is, once again, very reasonable. Goldfinger might just be winning me over.
It's hard to make fun of them, so I'll just relate my favorite (possibly apocryphal) story about another famously vegetarian band, The Smiths. It was in fact Morrissey who was the big vegetarian, and he more or less forced the rest of the band into adopting his diet by telling the press was the whole band were vegetarians. In one concert, as he was singing the anti-carnivore anthem "Meat Is Murder", fans started throwing sausages as an expression of support, in much the same way as fans of the Barenaked Ladies and the Foo Fighters threw Kraft Dinner and Mentos at those bands in tribute. As Morrissey's mouth closed as he sang the word "murder", a sausage flew right into his mouth and he bit down on it.
I love the old Mozzer, but picturing his ensuing spasms of tears and retching and muffled cries of "Oh God!" is just plain hilarious.
Update: Looking at the envelope again, I notice that although it was sent from the PETA headquarters in Norfolk, Virginia, it was sent on behalf of a couple residing just a couple of blocks away from my house! Should Ruddy Ruddy expect them to knock on the door for a meet-and-greet sometime soon?
The latter seems likely, as they've thoughtfully sent along a vegetarian starter kit. If they thought they were preaching to the choir, they'd surely assume Ruddy Ruddy to already be keeping a vegetarian diet. They've also sent a CD-ROM containing a video of the song "Free Me", which is performed by John Feldmann of Goldfinger. As you might expect, the video contains "powerful footage of animals" -- cattle being branded and chicken being debeaked, for instance.
I didn't know Goldfinger were a vegetarian band, although it turns out their song "FTN" stands for "Fuck Ted Nugent", which is in itself an eminently reasonable viewpoint for many reasons. The lyrics are both pro-animal and anti-Jennifer Lopez, which is, once again, very reasonable. Goldfinger might just be winning me over.
It's hard to make fun of them, so I'll just relate my favorite (possibly apocryphal) story about another famously vegetarian band, The Smiths. It was in fact Morrissey who was the big vegetarian, and he more or less forced the rest of the band into adopting his diet by telling the press was the whole band were vegetarians. In one concert, as he was singing the anti-carnivore anthem "Meat Is Murder", fans started throwing sausages as an expression of support, in much the same way as fans of the Barenaked Ladies and the Foo Fighters threw Kraft Dinner and Mentos at those bands in tribute. As Morrissey's mouth closed as he sang the word "murder", a sausage flew right into his mouth and he bit down on it.
I love the old Mozzer, but picturing his ensuing spasms of tears and retching and muffled cries of "Oh God!" is just plain hilarious.
Update: Looking at the envelope again, I notice that although it was sent from the PETA headquarters in Norfolk, Virginia, it was sent on behalf of a couple residing just a couple of blocks away from my house! Should Ruddy Ruddy expect them to knock on the door for a meet-and-greet sometime soon?
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